The Saint Rose Chronicle

Issue date: 3/28/07 Section: Sports

The Weapons of Mass Destruction celebrate after their three peat of the Dodgeball Madness crown.

Dodgeball, the sport generated by Physical Education, tested by time, and recently made famous by film, exploded yet again at The College of Saint Rose during Dodgeball Madness. Eight teams took the court with tenacity on March 20th, but only one left with victory. That team was Weapons of Mass Destruction featuring Burt Reynolds, a team that one would say should be ecstatic with the victory, living in their moment of glory. Unfortunately this wasn't a Cinderella story, this was a dynasty.

You see, Weapons of Mass Destruction featuring Burt Reynolds has won a consecutive three years, their victories in dodgeball have become all too expected. With trained catches and dominate throws, Weapons of Mass Destruction featuring Burt Reynolds displayed a very skillful and confident team.

"Probably the fact that one of the members [Joseph Pryba] almost damaged an occipital lobe of one of his victims," said Pat Lavey, when asked for an example of the dominance Weapons showed over the competition. The description although exaggerated and violent brings up a very good point to the three time champion's success: Joe Pryba.

Pryba has a developed skill for the game of dodgeball, a skill honed in a Girls and Boys club where he played as a child.

"My main inspiration is Michael Jordan, when I was a kid I thought that he played dodgeball, it was the best mistake of my life," said Pryba.

With dramatic quotes, and a cannon that makes the Navy envious, it isn't strange to believe he is the team's driving force. Unfortunately for any of their opponents Pryba plays a minor role.

Aimee Gould, Sara Pauze and John Virga are consistent in catches, keeping their teammates off the benches. Jonathan Accardi, Ryan Keelor, and Joe Cipriano all take down players with ease, that accompanied with Shawn "Primetime" Gilligan's speed and Jeanine Laukatis' expert mental distraction, The Weapons of Mass Destruction Featuring Burt Reynolds is an all around complete force of dodgeball mayhem.

Needless to say this leaves Dodgeball Madness in a strange phase, with a seemingly impenetrable team sitting on the throne for three years, a message is sent to teams who think they can conquer the Weapons of Mass Destruction featuring Burt Reynolds. Maybe then the fans can see a Cinderella story much like the 1980 U.S. Olympic hockey team over the Russians, or maybe this dynasty closely relates to Lance Armstrong in his seven straight wins of the Tour De France. The only thing for sure is that Weapons of Mass Destruction featuring Burt Reynolds sit patiently on their throne waiting for an opponent with the caliber to beat them.

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